Comments on: Facebook Flirting Harmless? I Thought So Until I Caught Her

By: littlegiz

littlegiz — Wed, 08 Sep 2010 04:07:56 +0000

It is hard to deal with. I have been in therapy and still find myself checkng our phone bill and FB and email. I just got another kick in the gut today. I reminded my husband of how much his texting the other woman hurt me and he told me that she “has lots of experience” since she formally worked as a stripper and a phone sex worker! WTF! He claimed that he “doesnt even know her last name” and that is a lie. I found her business card in his wallet with her full name and the number/address to her current employer,which is a local college. It doesnt help that this little tramp is 20 years younger than him! My husband keeps making the excuse that he was lonely working out of state and this woman showed him attention. I have a hard time believing that he texted her at all hours of the night and day but never touched her. Is is possible for a man to text sexual messages back and forth with an attractive young woman and not have sex with her? She lives very close to where he was living when he was working out of state. I am going to keep working on our relationship but the hurt and lack of trust are still there.

By: brittany

brittany — Wed, 08 Sep 2010 01:58:51 +0000

i just found out about 8 hrs ago my husband of three years was chatting with women on fb… i found out the whole truth all these women that he was talking to… he denies any connection other than the asked for a friend request and he accepted… but the truth came out today…. though many of these women live in different parts of the WORLD, he has been having sexual conversations and one even said if he wants he can go to her house in canada and they can have some alone time…. i cant believe it…. im mind blown right now i want to cry but cant manage the tears anymore…. i dont know what to do….i need help…

By: littlegiz

littlegiz — Sat, 28 Aug 2010 13:35:07 +0000

GummiTomm, I agree with your comments. After I busted my husband with the tons of text messages (of course I couldnt read them but found the proof of them on our phone bill), I told him I needed his Facebook and email passwords. He gave them to me after insinuating that I already knew what they were. Obviously, I did not have his passwords prior to that or I would have read several messages back and forth with one of the women that he was communicating with. His 300 text messages back and forth with two women had been deleted before I even discovered what was going on. The sad thing is that he had told me last Fall that his “first love” had found him on Facebook and they had sent each other several messages back and forth. He let me read them every time she sent him one and I found that she is a very nice married woman who is honest and upfront. They both talked about their spouses and children and it was not sneaky in any way. When my husband was out of state working for several months, that is when he was “found” by another long lost schoolmate who just happened to be a gorgeous, divorced woman who seems to be trolling for attention from married men. He took the bait and this started a two month email/text message long distance flirt. I am still having trouble trusting him and find myself checking our phone bill online every week. He can check whatever he wants to on my end because I am not a cheat. I keep having this creepy feeling that he may have “hooked up” with one of the women he was text messaging, since she lived really close to him. I also get the creepy feeling that he would have had sex with the long distance woman if I had not caught him. I am working on my trust issues but it is not easy.

By: GummiTomm

GummiTomm — Fri, 27 Aug 2010 22:57:21 +0000

sorry about my english, i only learned the languadge in school and i was not the best student in that class

By: GummiTomm

GummiTomm — Fri, 27 Aug 2010 22:53:38 +0000

why not just give your parkner your facebook password and get theyr password in trade? I have a girlfriend wich i love veeeery much, but i am dealing with sum trust issuse, not because of her or anything its just something inside me that tells me that most girls will cheat, i am probable having theys issuse because my mother is very unfaithfull and when i have been single i have had a lot of attention from girls that are in relationships. The girl i am dating now is the only reson why i have intrest in relationships, if it was not for her i think i would just stay single.
But one thing tho, that i would like to ask, Why is it like everybody says it is a bad thing too investigate if your girlfriend is honest or not? Why is that bad, if you have some kind of reson to think she may be cheating i think you should try to be sneaky and find out, because if you dont you will just feel really really bad and i think that feeling can ruin the trust and relationship.
If my girlfriend would have some kind of reson for thinking i might be cheating on her i would want her to try to be sneaky and find out instad of feeling bad about it and keep it inside and try to trust me anyway.
Because if she would try to find out she would find out that she was wrong. I think we all have fair sometimes of our partner cheating, and if you have fair for any reason you should in my apinion look in too it,

I will be giving my girlfriend all the information she needs too bust me, like my facebook password, and msn passwords, she can read my phone messages when ever she likes, i wont risk keeping a secret with someone else over the trust of my relationship. I think that should build her trust for me, she could also see when i turn some girld down if they are trying to flirt with me and that would just be a bonus for the trust,
And with me being this way i think she will trust me and feel better about us.
But what do you think?

By: Dianne

Dianne — Thu, 05 Aug 2010 03:57:08 +0000

Same thing is happening to me and I have found out time and time again and I am at my wits end because it always ends up with him going off at me for checking up on him and not trusting him. How can I trust him when continually he just tells me what I want to hear and then goes straight back to messaging, chatting and sending photos etc to these women. There was even a woman who he went to school with years ago that was “just friends” and then started the sex stuff – I checked his phone and saw messages from her. So, I sent a message to her husband and told him to check whathis wife was up to – of course I was the bad guy coz it wasnt my place to do so. Hey – Im being cyber cheated on so is he – he should know. They promised not to do it anymore and just blocked me – eventually it became apparent that for the sake of our relationship it had to stop. He has again promised me and now I find messages to someone he has added to play Frontierville. I dont know whether to say I know about it or just leave it because it must be an addiction. I know he wont do anything physically but it is the emotional side that hurts. Is it my fault? I dont know the answer – to me it is cheating whatever way you look at it. He lies to my face. Maybe I should just leave????

By: Ann

Ann — Tue, 03 Aug 2010 20:33:56 +0000

I feel your pain FBCasualty, I hope your future is brighter.

By: Ann

Ann — Tue, 03 Aug 2010 20:17:18 +0000

I agree Kmarie and baybay and lisa, I found out that the man I had been living with had cheated on his last girlfriend, with me…starting over facebook. He looked me up and he built on the past relationship we had and never told be that he was with someone. He started our relationship on a lie and when I found out, I realized he was doing to me what he had done to her. He started pushing me away, taking his phone into the bathroom and posting on facebook. After reading all his email and facebook mail, I found that he was telling everyone that he was never going to get married. I also found out that he had kept an online dating account the entire time we where together. I confronted him and moved out that night. The next week he asked out a friend of mine that I had introduced him to and who he had facebook friended. A cheating dishonest person will always be a cheating dishonest person, they are only concerned with their selfish wants.

By: Rassy

Rassy — Sat, 24 Jul 2010 02:37:46 +0000

lol the look on her face would be pricelesss

By: littlegiz

littlegiz — Fri, 16 Jul 2010 00:35:45 +0000

I go on Facebook all the time and have never gotten into intimate conversations with my male friends or exes on the site. I love my husband and the thought of enticing or coming onto another man is not cool. I think it is dangerous to flirt when you are married because it can lead to all kinds of problems. Of course the fantasyland friend is exciting because you dont have to put up with the everyday issues that are part of a committed relationship. My husband has told me that his Facebook friend wanted to “take the relationship further” and this led to him cutting off contact with her. It probably didnt help that I called and left a message on her phone reminding her that she was carrying on an email/text relationship with a married man. It will take time for me to trust my husband again and I am still very hurt that he behaved in such a way.